73. Why Social Stories are a MUST for Autistic Kids

Written By Brittyn Coleman, MS, RDN/LD

In this episode of the Nourishing Autism podcast, Brittyn welcomes Tara Phillips, a speech-language pathologist and founder of Autism Little Learners! With over 25 years of experience, Tara shares her extensive knowledge of social stories, which are essential tools for supporting autistic children through transitions and routines. 

Join Brittyn and Tara as they unravel the magic and history of social stories! Listen in to gain valuable insights into how social stories can reduce anxiety and improve daily transitions, both big and small.

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TRANSCRIPT

Hi, I'm Brittyn, a Registered Dietitian and autism sibling. I have a passion for helping parents of neurodivergent kids navigate nutrition and wellness for their child, one small step at a time. Here we'll explore practical nutrition tips, learn from top autism experts, break down the newest research, and share inspirational stories that will empower you to utilize nutrition to help your child feel their best and thrive.

Listen in while picking kids up from school, sitting in a therapy waiting room, taking a quick walk or wherever you find yourself, looking for some inspiration and a friend to guide you along this journey. This is Nourishing Autism.

Brittyn: Hey everybody, I'm Brittyn Coleman. I'm the Autism Dietitian. Welcome back to the Nourishing Autism podcast where we talk all things nutrition for kids on the autism spectrum. I also love bringing in guest experts so that we can learn more about holistic health and we can learn from other experts on how to best support our kiddos. And today is one of those examples where I am chatting with one of my favorite colleagues. Her name is Tara, and she is with Autism Little Learners.

Tara is a dedicated speech language pathologist with over 25 years of experience working with young autistic children. And recognizing a need for engaging resources, she founded Autism Little Learners in 2019. Tara's passion for learning and her innovative approach have consistently driven her to find new ways to support her [00:02:00] students and their families.

Now she runs Autism Little Learners full time and offers a wealth of resources, including courses and an online membership for educators and parents of young autistic children. Her commitment to fostering inclusive education is also reflected in a recently published children's book, The Different Ways We Communicate, which aims to celebrate and support diverse communication styles.

Tara is a wealth of knowledge, and I'm so excited for you to get to learn from her. We are going to dig into social stories today, which can be a fantastic visual resource for your kiddos to help reduce anxiety and improve transitions, which I know all of us as parents struggle with. Transitions are hard, transitions away from favorite activities, transitions into unpreferred activities.

So this is going to be one of those really key ingredients in helping those transitions be even easier. I'm really excited for you to hear my recording with Tara. Let's go ahead and dive in.

 [00:03:00]

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Hey everyone, welcome back to the Nourishing Autism podcast. Today I am sitting here with a good friend who I'm so excited to chat with, hosted a really fantastic summit [00:04:00] this past year that I got to be a part of and I'm just excited to bring her on the podcast, so welcome in.

Tara: Thank you. I'm so excited that we get to connect again because that means, I think this is the third time we've been able to actually see each other and talk in person this year.

Well, not in person, but online face to face.

Brittyn: Thank you so much for being here and I'm so excited to chat with you and we're digging into something that I haven't

talked about on the podcast before and it sounds like you actually haven't talked about it on any other podcast either which

is social stories and that's something that I have so many people coming to me with questions about around mealtime but I'm

now kind of realizing I don't think that I fully understand social stories just from our conversation that we just had before this started recording.

So I'm so excited.

Tara: I'm excited too. And social stories have been around a long time. And I have been a speech language pathologist for like 26 years. So I [00:05:00] think they've been around longer than I've been in the field.

Brittyn: That's so amazing. Well, I mean, before we dive in, I want you to tell us who you are, what you do, and who you help.

Tara: Yeah, absolutely. So, I'm Tara Phillips. I'm a speech language pathologist, and I've taught young autistic kids my entire career, and the first half was at the elementary level. And the second half was at the early childhood level. And I loved both levels for different reasons. I recently left the classroom to run Autism Little Learners full time.

And with Autism Little Learners, I help busy and stressed educators and parents of young autistic children. I really focus on three to five year olds, and I help them move past that overwhelm and develop confidence through trainings and a variety of educational resources.

Brittyn: And I think variety is the keyword here because you do so much and I didn't realize it until I was digging into your website.

I mean, you [00:06:00] hosted the Preschool Autism Summit this past, was that in July?

Tara: That was July.

Brittyn: Yeah, with an insane amount of people that attended, and then you also have parent resources all over your website, so I'm really impressed that you serve so many populations, because it's a whole different subset of resources for different types of people.

So I'm impressed.

Tara: Thank you. I started out with just, I wanted to make resources for education that were at the right level for my autistic three to five year olds, because teachers, SLPs, we had to modify everything. And so that's where I got started. Well then, the more resources I made, the more requests I got for training.

How do I use this? How do I implement this strategy? And I thought I was going to be teaching educators. And then parents were like, well, I want to know too. And so we kind of have a mix of both in things like my membership or my courses.

Brittyn: I was going to ask, what are some of [00:07:00] the most popular resources that you are creating?

I see that you have your social story library but what are some of the other resources that you give to parents and educators?

Tara: I think a lot of visual supports. And so it could be surrounding anything, whether it's visual supports for play. To kind of help introduce new play schemes or play actions.

So I have a set that goes with dinosaurs and the set that goes with trains and, you know, just kind of helping educators and parents know what they can do to help encourage play. I have obviously a lot of communication and language kind of resources. And I think the adopted books that I have are probably one of the most popular, so you can take any book that you have, any board book, add pictures to it, and you can do it on your own, or you can purchase pre made sets that I have to make it easier.

But I also do a lot of teaching on how to make them yourself with books you already have at home. And [00:08:00] parents really love that as well as teachers do.

Brittyn: That's so cool. And I'll be sure to link all of your information in the show notes for anyone who's interested in grabbing it and I'll just plug you now, but you're Autism Little Learners on Instagram.

So but I would love to hop into social stories and if you wouldn't mind giving us a little bit of a backstory on social stories, what these are and who they might benefit to utilize.

Tara: Yeah, absolutely. So, as I said, social stories started quite a while ago. It was actually in the early 1990s, and they were developed by Carol Gray, and she used them to start to teach things like new routines.

She discovered that these little stories, informational stories she would write, would help her students or her clients. And so Carol Gray has a whole system, a whole way that she does it that's evidence based. And for that exact [00:09:00] method, you need to go to one of her trainings, and we can link her in the show notes too.

But when she developed this, I learned about it when I was at the elementary level. And so I went to a training, learned how to do them in her way. And so she has all these really specific things that are the perspective that you write the story from, the types of sentences, so she'll have like descriptive sentences and directive sentences and things like that.

So it's really, really specific when you go to her training and it's amazing. Now, the stories that I write for the masses are not

individualized, obviously, so I might have a story about getting a haircut or going to a new school and those parents and educators could individualize them more or use them as a basis to create an actual Carol Gray type social story or use them as is to just provide that information for kids.

[00:10:00] But it's a way you can introduce new routines, changes in the routine that are coming up. I think back to elementary level, like, Oh gosh, sometimes we'd have an early release due to a snow day or, you know, partway through the day, that changes the routine and can be really distressing. Even though most of us would think, well, hey, going home early is a great thing.

It's easy. Well, for our autistic students and kids, just a change, whether we deem it good or bad, it's still hard. They can be made of just written words, just sentences. You can have pictures with them. So with the younger kids, mine are mainly pictures with just a few simple sentences. And they help kids understand things like that new routine, a new activity that's going to be happening, we would write them if we were having a, do you remember the word lyceum?

They used to call it a lyceum or like a, you know, when everyone goes to the gym and there's some sort of presentation, like someone's there from the zoo showing some things. [00:11:00] You can prepare kids for things like that, new activities that are going to be happening. And they're really great for preparing a child.

And by doing that, you're reducing their anxiety, which leads to less dysregulation and probably less meltdowns. And so knowing what to expect and what's coming is good for all of us. And that can help kids improve transition, specifically autistic kids. So I hope that is a decent overview. Oh, I know, one other thing.

A social story or an informational story should not be a list of what not to do. Okay? So when Carol talked, about the types of sentences to use, the ones that she uses the least of are directive sentences. So you don't want a social story to be like, I will not hit. Hitting is bad. Like this whole list of the negatives, the rules.

That is not going to engage [00:12:00] any young child, especially our autistic friends who, that is just going to be a major turnoff. And so we need to engage them and I'll talk about some ways you can do that, but just remember you don't say, oh, I'm going to write a social story for hitting and then have it be a list of, I will not do this.

I will not do this.

Brittyn: Yeah. That's a really great tip. Cause I'm even thinking about reading that to my son and it's like, I would be bored reading it to him, you know, like something engaged, it makes so much sense. I guess my thought is, well, first of all, what I'm

taking away from what you're saying is that these should be used in just even smaller, regular transitions, if

something is new, versus I think a lot of times we think of social stories of okay, school is starting, some big thing,

which is great, or we're going on an airplane, or these big, one time deals.

But what I'm hearing you say is these can [00:13:00] actually be really great to be using for smaller experiences too. And I think that kids have, I mean, we know that kids have a hard time with transitions, especially autistic kids. And so I just wonder how do you, cause I'm trying to think of like creating all of these different social stories for my son.

I'm like, that must be a lot of work too, but I'm wondering how do you turn out these social stories or how do you have them paired? For when these transitions are happening, is it as hard as it sounds? How do you actually create one? I guess is what I'm thinking.

Tara: Yeah. In the ones that I provide free, for me, it first came from experience. Like what I was experiencing in the classroom, I'd write a story for it. And I think I'm not the only one experiencing this. But like you said, some can be for one time things, or things that don't happen as often.

I have one for going in an airplane. I have one for trick or treating. The Easter Bunny, all of these things that, [00:14:00] yeah, we do them every so often, or once a year, but we have to revisit that every year because it's not an everyday routine. It's not a predictable routine. And so I think that's the biggest thing.

I'll give you some examples of, I think you're kind of getting at, like, what situations do you use them and some of those smaller things. So you could have one, if you have a student that you notice, they're really not understanding, checking their schedule. And just that one piece of it, okay, they're following their schedule, but like getting to it and checking it, that might be a good social story.

Just laying out the exact steps, bringing the attention to that, and so you just start looking at the day and thinking of all these little things. I'll also tell you about what we called on the fly social story, because those are the more realistic ones, especially for parents. So...

Brittyn: I think that's kind of where I was getting of when you're in a bind and you know you need one, can you just whip one out of thin air?

Tara: [00:15:00] Yeah, yeah, exactly. Okay, I'll talk about those first, the "on the fly" because they're really realistic and then I'll kind of go into some other times when they might be really helpful. So, many times as educators, we are in the middle of a transition, it always seems to be a

transition where we're like going through the lobby to go to the bus at the end of the day, and there's a million parents there in a

big audience, you know, and it's probably, it could be due to the sensory aspect of it's noisier in there, but often we have a student that will drop down

to the floor and we have that breakdown in the transition and you're standing there in front of all these people and there's a lot of pressure on the adult

to figure it out and that is one time where an on the fly social story is so helpful. So literally this is a true story. That exact scenario happened.

I'm alone. I [00:16:00] don't have, you know, my paras are bringing other kids out to the bus, so I look over and I see the secretary, and I'm like, hey, can you bring me a pen and a piece of paper? Okay, so they bring it over, and I draw, the thing with this

student was that day, they normally go on the bus, but mom was there to pick them up, and that was a change, and again, you'd think, well, their parent's there, that's great, kids would prefer that. But it was a change in the routine and enough to make him stop in his tracks and go down and be like, I'm froze, you know? So I get the pen and paper and I draw the worst picture of a bus ever. It looked like a roller skate. And I just said, no bus. And I put the universal sign of no over it.

Like, okay, there's a change. We have no bus. And then the next, I drew like four squares on there. Cause I wasn't going to be able to make a story with pages, but [00:17:00] okay, no bus, but mom's here and we're going in mom's car and they're stick figures. They're like the worst drawings ever. My dad was a junior high art teacher and he would have been like, wow, Tara, but this is a thing.

 It's partially narrating it out loud too. They don't care what your drawing looks like. He totally understood it and took the piece of paper and walked out to the car. So on the fly, those are the times where they really can work like magic, not every time if the child's way too dysregulated,

the paper's going to get thrown or crumpled up, but sometimes, especially when they start getting used to you doing that. So if I had students that I had written social stories for quite a few times in the moment like that, if I get a piece of paper and start writing and I'll say, oh,

 Mom is coming today and they'll come over and look and watch me do it, even three year olds. And when you're [00:18:00] drawing the pictures and I'm like, no bus, mom's coming. Awesome if you can do it ahead of time and not in the lobby, but that's just a way you can use the "on the fly" and you start to get that buy in.

Brittyn: That's amazing. And also I'm having a moment where I'm realizing I did that with my son and I didn't know, I didn't

realize what I was doing, but now I'm giving myself this little pat on the back because we were leaving the park, there was this little wagon and he wanted it so bad.

And so the whole way home sobbing wagon, wagon. And we got home and I was just like this is dysregulation through the roof. And we had to go home for nap time and we had to be home. And so there were some crayons there and we drew a wagon. We drew Sammy in the wagon.

We drew him going to sleep and then going to get the wagon at the park. And I was so shocked how much he calmed down because I was like, this is a Hail Mary. I literally don't have anything else to

offer at this [00:19:00] moment and it worked and I was so surprised, I mean he was like sad for a little bit and we kind of got him

out of it, got a snack, went to bed. And then we went to the park later and he was like "WAGON!" It's like yes, we talked about this! But he's

not even two yet but it was the first time I think he really understood that verbal cue was not working for him.

When I was telling him, wagon later, he was like, I want wagon now. But being able to see it, I think, really just changed it for him. That was the one and only time I've done that. But I am patting myself on the back for doing it now. But I could have seen how that could have been so much better

set up had I done it on the fly, like when things were happening, as opposed to after he was dysregulated.

Tara: Yeah. And then, you know, if it's something that happens a lot with a specific student or more than one student, that's when I go,

okay, I might write the story and get some cute pictures and do it ahead of time and laminate it or just have a couple copies so that now we can prepare ahead [00:20:00] of time.

So a certain student that maybe starts having trouble with the transition from the playground to the bus. Or for parents, from the playground to the car. Well, then you're like, okay, this has happened a couple of times and they're really dysregulated. They're not hearing my words, you know, and this would be a great time to have that additional support.

And I think the things I'm describing right now too, are like a cross between a really simplified social story, visual supports, you know, a visual schedule. Sometimes you might put like, what's next, all of this stuff you can do with stick figures on the fly, it does not have to be pretty.

Brittyn: I think a lot of people get held up and we see these beautiful visuals online and beautiful stories, people selling them on Etsy and teachers pay teachers, all of these things.

And I think we hold ourselves to that expectation as parents that we have to have this perfect you know, bound social story. But what I hear you saying is these are [00:21:00] still so beneficial, even if you're just showing up with a piece of paper and a pen, it could still be beneficial.

Tara: And I tell parents to have a notebook and a pen or even a dry erase board, cause you could then just reuse it,

but it helps you when you're in a pickle, you know, like when sometimes parents will be driving from one place to the next, and they want to prepare the child for what they're going to do.

You know, okay, we're going to go to Target, draw the big Target, and then McDonald's, and just kind of so they can fit

that one more stop in, or it gives you a tool to be able to prepare a student, and even in the

classroom where I have tons of the pre made visuals sometimes something will come up even on a visual schedule where

it's like, I don't have a picture for that snack they brought today so I will literally get this little post it and I'll draw a picture of it and stick it on their visual schedule or on their communication book.

Brittyn: So good. I have also heard, you know, [00:22:00] Molly from Autism Consultant, she'll have screenshots on her phone and a folder that she'll store or tell parents to store photos. And I'm like, oh, that's also, I could see that. I like the idea of actually not having to use a screen. But I also, I mean, it's kind of a good idea to have all of those in one place where you can communicate, which I think is really cool.

I love that. Well, thank you for sharing. And I mean, in terms of actually writing the social story, I hear you and you're like, okay, this is not a do not do list. This is like, I'm engaging, see yourself in the story and what the child is experiencing. So you have this library where people can get

the free template and then you have the ones that they can buy where it's already filled in. That's what you're saying.

Tara: No, they're all free. All the, yeah, all the filled in ones. So I have written ones that for the early childhood level, but early [00:23:00] elementary could use them too. And they're really helpful for creating predictable routines or introducing something new.

So it might be a story about the bedtime routine or going to a birthday party or visiting the Easter Bunny or Santa. They can be helpful for things that are maybe challenging for the autistic child, like getting a haircut. You know, you think of all that. A story can be one piece in kind of helping with that tough situation.

Transitioning to a new school, going to the doctor. And so social stories are good for introducing things also like holding hands in a parking lot, going to the grocery store and the routine of going to school or bedtime routine.

Brittyn: I'm also wondering, I mean, a lot of the families I work with, one of their biggest problems at school when it comes to nutrition is like their kids aren't

eating at all, and so I think a lot of times that comes down to how overwhelming the cafeteria is, what their food is going to be like at school,

how it's going to look, so I could see there being a really good [00:24:00] social story

that could help fill in that gap of we don't have a microwave and kind of helping them know what to expect when they're also eating some of their favorite foods that are out of context and they're maybe prepared a little bit differently than they typically are at home.

So I'm kind of running that through my head. If you have one, let me know.

Tara: I don't for that. So I think we should collaborate on that and get that out, because I think that is a tough one. I've had students that have eaten in the lunchroom, the cafeteria, and others that stay back and would, at the elementary level, used to eat in my classroom.

And there's some different things that you can do to kind of help prepare. And like I said, the social story can be one piece. And then another piece might be the sensory considerations, like the noise blocking headphones and then teaching other people around them about their selective eating, you know, because we're not going to change that alone with the social [00:25:00] story.

It's very nuanced and individual as you know, that's your area of expertise to knowing about that. But I recently did a big presentation in Colorado and talked to all staff members of the school district, including cafeteria workers. And one of the big things, I made a handout for them that kind of gave them instructions on not pushing a child to eat certain foods that are on their plate.

Brittyn: And we talked on this call right before, I think somebody had just asked you hey, do you have any visuals to help with this child in my classroom who doesn't eat anything, but they do drink a lot of things. And you were really quick to say, hey, it's so much more than a visual.

And it is. And so I'm really appreciative that you said that because I think we've oversimplify eating sometimes and we overcomplicate

it, but sometimes just saying, okay, and next you take a bite. Well, there's so much that leads up to that. But [00:26:00] it is interesting to me to think of okay, what if the very beginning early stages of eating where we touch a food and we smoosh it and we do all these things.

I'm just wondering, I feel like there could be such a use of a social story in that situation to meet kids where they're in this touching phase versus the eating phase where it can be in their sensory comfort zone. So I'm like, okay.

Tara: Okay, we have stuff to talk about. For sure. We'll get that to you, everybody.

Brittyn: Exactly. We'll follow up. Well, share how people can find you and where your resources are and where to follow you, all the things.

Tara: Yeah, well, like you said, Instagram, Facebook, Autism Little Learners. So if you just memorize those three words, you will be good on YouTube, everywhere. My website, which can kind of direct you in all those different directions is www.

autismlittlelearners. com. And I have a podcast called the Autism Little Learners Podcast and [00:27:00] Brittyn is actually on there. And when you spoke Brittyn of that educator that emailed me, I said, first, listen to this podcast episode with Brittyn Coleman, because this is going to give you the information you need before implementing any kind of visual support with your student that's not eating at school.

Brittyn: I love that. I had so much fun on your podcast. You're always so much fun to talk to. Before we started recording this, we were 15 minutes in and I was like, oh my gosh, we got to start recording because...

Tara: Yes. Why does this always happen? I swear when I interview people too, I'm like, oh, it's going to be 20 minutes.

And then I'm like, oh, sorry. It was 50.

Brittyn: Those are the best kind of interviews though. But thank you so much for spending your time with that. All of your resources that you mentioned in the show notes for anybody who wants to grab it. And thanks again for joining us. We'll have to do another episode because I feel like we have so much more to talk about.

Tara: Thank you so much, Brittyn.

[00:28:00]

Transcribed by Descript

About Brittyn Coleman, MS, RDN/LD

Brittyn Coleman, MS, RDN/LD, is a distinguished Registered Dietitian and Autism Nutrition Expert, known for her innovative, sensory-friendly feeding approach to nutrition for children on the autism spectrum. As the founder of the Nourishing Autism Collective, and as an autism sibling herself, Brittyn brings both professional expertise and personal understanding to her work. She empowers families with her expert guidance, helping children receive essential nutrients for optimal health and development. Her strategies are tailored to the unique dietary needs and sensory preferences of each child.

Brittyn's influence extends beyond her membership site through her active social media presence and her popular podcast, 'Nourishing Autism'. Her educational content on Instagram, YouTube, and other platforms has established her as a leading voice in autism nutrition, providing valuable resources, practical advice, and a supportive community for parents and professionals. 

Brittyn Coleman, MS, RDN/LD https://www.autismdietitian.com
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